March 2, 2014

Discovering Dargatz #4 - Lopsided Billiards

I was fortunate to have a billiards table in my basement.  I spent many hours playing pool with friends, practicing trick shots, and foolishly playing a "air hockey table-inspired" game involving billiards balls and  table tennis rackets. Sounds great, right?  I may failed to mention that the table had some issues. Whether it was an unbalanced basement floor or the fact that this table was older than dirt and not kept in pristine condition, this table was lopsided and the playing surface was uneven, which made it an interesting to attempt playing an actual game of pool.  Through years of practicing geometric angles and perfecting the slope of this abomination of a table, I mastered the game and was a very successful "lopsided" pool player.  If only I could find a bar or tavern with a lopsided table.  I would be quite the lopsided pool shark.  Now, I know I shouldn't use this table as an excuse for my abysmal performance with normal, well-kept tables, but I am going to anyway. Playing the odd and ridiculous angles of my lopsided table are ingrained in my being and I cannot change my style of play. I am forever a lopsided player.

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